I made an old lady blush today at work because she ordered two senior coffees and I said “SENIOR ? I’m sorry miss, i’m going to have to ask to see some ID.” and she covered her mouth and went “Oh dear me” and couldn’t stop smiling
Recent studies confirm that reading books and drinking tea doesn’t make you better than anyone else
im pretty sure somebody hid the final paragraph of my essay on a shelf i cant reach, but i dont want to jump to conclusions
IS THIS REAL.
LETS ALL APPRECIATE FOR A MOMENT THAT THE UNIVERSE EVOLVED JUST RIGHT TO MAKE THIS PUN POSSIBLE
happy halloween. its fucking halloween every day from now until the end of october. happy fucking halloween
one time i forced my mom to play pokemon for at least half an hour and all she did was catch a butterfree and name it lowfat
children wake up early because they still get excited about life
this is the saddest thing I’ve seen on here
Is it true that straight boys eat footballs for breakfast
yeah everyday, the leather makes them feel more secure about their inability to satisfy women
"men don’t ever face sexism."
wow gee i’m sorry that this joke reduced your pay and made you way more at risk of sexual assault because men face sexism
it has been one of my greatest dreams to beat the living shit out of something at least once so god fucking help anybody that ever tries to assault me because i will be brimming with every violent urge that i have ever tucked away in my entire life